All we crave is connecting with other people. It's at the foundation of everything we do and all our interactions. It is the source of our joy and our pain. I recently learned that in order for a true connection to be made, one has to give and the other must receive. My internal dialogue has always been 'it's better to give than to receive' so when I heard this, it was pretty much a huh? moment. When you look around, it's easy to put people in the 'giver' or 'taker' category.
I fear being put in the taker category so I've trained myself to be a world-class giver. I've even build a really great business giving and serving others. I'm incredibly independent and rarely do I ask for help beyond seeking guidance from others in my quest to evolve. Tejpal (from Miraval) told me that I needed to learn how to receive about 3 months ago during an energy healing phone call. By not doing so, I would continue to deplete myself. So I started and my first attempt at 'asking' was in my business and from our clients. It was THE most difficult thing that I've ever had to do (more on this later behind another door).
It all started to make sense - everywhere you go, regardless of what you are doing and in every situation with another person, we are making connections. And, in order for those interactions to be genuine, there must be a give & a take. I like to think about the act of giving like a gift and the other person expresses gratitude by accepting it. Here are some simple ways that I am practicing:
1. When someone offers me a drink, I now say yes. So stupid, I know, but I never want to be a burden to anyone so 99% of the time, I would say 'I'm fine' unless I was dehydrated.
2. When I receive a compliment, I now say thank you instead of immediately responding with a compliment or saying something like 'no I'm not'. Again, ridiculous.
3. Listening. It's the perfect way to receive what someone else is giving. I just shut the 'pie-hole' and listen. This is a challenge cuz I want to give something right back right away.
Now that I've invited you behind Door #4, be curious about your human connections, if your tendency is to give or take and how you can practice making genuine connections that will fill you both up. If you do nothing else, just smile more often. Love is the BEST gift and in return, love will come right back to you. Let the connections begin.
With love,
Katie