Hearing the phrase "let it go" it always makes we wonder. In fact, there are many phrases that I hear (be free, love your self, find your passion, etc) that are so cliche or surface that I'm constantly in a state of curiosity: huh, what does it actually mean? It's taken me a long time to better understand how to apply "letting go" to life and its purpose. Come on in so I can share with you how it's part of my life.
To me, letting go is like being a super hero for the PRESENT MOMENT. It's about control and the only thing we can really control is our own thoughts and actions and the present moment (like right this very second) yet we try to control whatever we can (people, outcomes, reactions) and we let the past or the future dictate our thoughts which turn into our actions -which can turn you into a psycho!
The act of letting go is really scary because we have trained ourselves from an early age to be in control and if we are not in control then we must be out of control and that's no way to live. The act of letting go happens with the tangible and intangible. We hold on to so much stuff - feelings (sadness, resentment, shame, embarrassment) and crap (stuffed in closets, filling up or houses, offices, inboxes, cars, clothes, junk drawers). We don't really appreciate the grasp we have on all of this. If you want a swift solution for all your crap, read 'the life-changing magic of tidying up' by marie kondo and carve out a few days to purge. If you are a freaky minimalist [envious] on the outside, then you are likely holding on to a lot on the inside. Truth is, we ALL are and it's super easy to try and hide it....and we try! And it's okay because that's part of the human condition.
The feelings piece is way more work without immediate gratification because - you guessed it - it requires you to be quiet and gain deep awareness. The best way to get there is to hang out behind Door #6 each day. Think of the act of letting go of anything as a release of energy, a source that you can't see but you feel all around you, all the time. And the more you let go, the more doors you will be able to open. You'll begin to take down some of the walls that surround you, open your heart and create more human connections.
Here are some things that I'm working on to try to illustrate the act of letting go:
1. Rock hard abs. I spend so much mental energy trying to figure out if I should have them, could I get them, what kind of exercise do I need to do to achieve them most efficiently, blah, blah. I'm not 100% ready to give up on them but I'm really trying to let this thought/goal just go. It doesn't really serve me and I'm certain I could spend all this time and energy on something a bit more productive. Note that I said mental energy....if it was indeed a top priority for me, I'd probably be actually doing something about it. Interesting. Let it go, girl.
2. Trying to make everyone happy. Work in progress. I certainly know that intellectually, it's not possible to make everyone I interact with happy but I sure do put a lot of effort to achieve it. I am intentionally trying to let go of these thoughts/behaviors and trust that my genuine kindness, compassion is enough.
3. Expectations. There are many imposed or self-imposed expectations on us. Be a good mother, wife, daughter. Dress a certain way. Don't say this, say that. Study hard, get good grades, get a job. Don't quit. Work hard. Always have a smile. Don't complain. Suck it up. The list could be a mile long. My ultimate goal is to find the gifts that God/The Universe gave me and let them shine through to have a massive positive impact on a massive amount of people. Big goal. And, in order for me make my way there, I must begin let go of expectations.My toolbox for this is to become more and more aware and to be intentional on discovering what is no longer serving me. It's a lot of work.
4. Revenue. This one was H.U.G.E. This year I had to be willing to let go of clients, clients I truly cared about, because what my business was giving and what we were receiving was completely out of balance. This knocks on so many doors. The process totally sucked for me but it had to be done and I did it AND everyone is doing just fine!
Surround yourself with people that are super heros of the present moment. If you are a control freak, then put your energies behind Door #7 to understand how to LET GO so you can gain more control + freedom + peace.
With love,
Katie